May 04, 2022

Offbeat Offline: April 2022


Welcome to Offbeat Offline, where I bring you up-to-date with what went on in my life during the month just gone, give you a sneak peek of my next shenanigans, and share my favourite posts of late!

What happened last month to yours truly? The end of a 20-plus-years job, basically ðŸ˜­. There's been other stuff of course, but nothing headlines-worthy like finding yourself jobless at 55 and badly needing the money and not having a clue what to do. I've had 3 months to prepare, and I'm still at square one. In other news, I've been declared thrombosis-free, my mum got Covid (bad cold and cough and everything tasted bitter, but she recovered nicely), and El0n Mu$k bought Twitter 🤢 (maybe I should request that my old account be reinstated, since it was suspended indefinitely because some bot used it to tweet about crypt0curr3ncy in his name. Oh the irony).

Also...last minute piece of news: I got my usual laryngitis (+ cold), because of course. At least I hope it is. I feel like I got hit by a truck, but I don't have a fever or other typical Covid symptoms. I'm getting a swab on Friday because I have a hair appointment for Saturday (THE PERM) and other errands to run, and I have to (hopefully) make sure I can go. I can't even begin to process the risk that my already small world could stop for an indefinite time. I feel like the universe's scapegoat at this point. Wasn't it enough what I've suffered since Dec. 31st 2020? Wasn't it enough that I lost my job and I've barely started my first month of unemployment? Wasn't my life as a whole shitty enough? I can't seem to catch a breath, and I'm so tired and angry. Even if it turns out not to be Covid, I feel like crap, and I'm facing my usual month-long suffering, because that's how my throat problems work. Anyhow...sorry for the rant, and sorry if mine sound like first-world problems to some of you, but there's only so much a person can endure. Please send healing vibes 😥.

Note: it's Fri. 6th, I had my swab this morning, and OF COURSE IT'S COVID 😭😭😭. They booked me a second swab for next Friday. Let's hope to be in the clear by then AT LEAST 🤒🤬.


📚 THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON. I just realised that all my April reads have been on the dark side. I mean...it's not like I ever read "fluffy" books, but a whole string of them? That's a lot, even for my standards 😂.
I read the Laughter at the Academy anthology by Seanan McGuire, which will be in my next bunch of mini reviews (spoiler: very imaginative, I really liked it).
I reread What We Buried by Kate A. Boorman for review purposes, and I was on the verge of giving up and letting my old mini review do the talking, because I was at a loss to do it justice with a "proper" one...but I can't bear not to write a full review for the books I really loved - plus I reasoned that this wouldn't be my first rodeo, and I'd always found a way to talk about tricky books before, so why not this one? Leaving the book without a full review would have been the easy way out, except it wasn't easy because it was paining me, and then again, when have I ever done "easy"? 😉 So, I wrote my review, and it isn't half bad, and it will go live in a few days.
I read Picture Unavailable by Andrew J. Brandt, which was in the Read Now section on NetGalley. Three stars - I'll post my mini in July, but you can read it on Goodreads for now (P.S.: the author graciously liked my review, even if I pointed out what I considered the book's weaknesses...).
I was approved for Last Exit by Max Gladstone on NetGalley at the last minute (the book expires in a few days). It's a long, tick novel, and it doesn't pull any punches, but I'm loving it. I'm going to squeeze my review into my already packed May schedule.


Here is my review plan for this month: 
  • Someone in Time: Tales of Time-Crossed Romance by Jonathan Strahan et al., Laughter at the Academy by Seanan McGuire [see above] and Switch by A.S. King (in a mini-review round on Sun. 8th);
  • the aforementioned What We Buried by Kate A. Boorman (on Thu. 12th) and Last Exit by Max Gladstone (on Sat. 28th).
Funny how many purple covers from different years
I managed to gather

Reviews aside, I mean to participate (if health permits) in two Tell Me Something Tuesday rounds: on the 17th (question: How long have you been blogging? And has your blog changed over time?) and on the 24th (question: Do you review every book you read? Why or why not?). The first is a prompt that I submitted, but hey, I'm actually answering someone else's question too, for a change! 😉 


📻RADIO GAGA. Fri. 29th marked my very last day at work (as most of you know, I've been a radio personality - so to speak, ha! what a joke - at a local station for 27 years, first as an occasional collaborator, then as a proper employee for the last 21 years...and now the station has closed). It was a sad affair, not only because of my new unemployment state. I mean, I wanted to quit - if I had had something else to fall back on, I would have a long time ago. There wasn't any joy to be had anymore in what I did, plus the money was a laugh, but...I couldn't turn it down, and I didn't know what else to do, yadda yadda. Anyhow, the saddest thing was that, on my very last day - while I was clearing all my audio files along with my doc ones (because I needed all my bridges burned) and going through my routine one last time - it finally crashed down on me full-force what I'd always known...how very little I'd mattered for all that time, and how I'd wasted my whole life riding the comedown of a broken dream. I'm no one, and no one will remember me - or maybe someone will, for a while, but like an afterthought, and then it will be like I was never there at all. One day I'll write a post about my radio experience, because I realise that you can't understand what I mean without my explaining a few things, but rest assured...I'm not being overdramatic. I did say goodbye, but in a way, I left in silence, and after all these years, silence is what I got in return 😢.


🥺THE ITALIAN JOB. It would have been different if I had quit on my own terms - at least I would have done it for a better life and with the perspective of getting better money. Plus, that would have constituted a statement to my boss: I'm not settling for scraps anymore. Try running a radio station without me, the one and only employee, the one who got the short end of the stick too many times but stayed, because she didn't know where else to turn. Which now I'm forced to do anyhow, at 55, without any qualifications or skills beyond the non-marketable radio ones. I'm looking, I'm asking, but there's nothing to be found so far, especially for someone who doesn't drive and doesn't have any experience in any field. I mean, I'm good with English and computers, but secretary jobs and the like are the hardest ones to find, plus most of the time they require the aforementioned experience and a specific knowledge base that I don't have (I'm diving deeper into the Office suite though, because there's so much about Word and Excel I don't know even if I've been using them for years, and I'm currently taking PowerPoint lessons via a YouTube channel). So, for now, I'm going to apply for unemployment benefits and keep looking...Please send good vibes my way.


PUBLISHING NEWS/TIPS

THINK-PIECES, DISCUSSIONS, ORIGINAL FICTION

REVIEWS/RECOMMENDATIONS

OTHER

That's it for now! My next post will be up on Sun 8th, and it will be the mini-review round I announced above.

So, what were your highs/lows in the past month?

27 comments:

  1. Sending healing vibes! I'm so sorry that happened with your job- I know I've said it before but saying again! I hope you feel better, stay Covid- free, and glad that your mom was alright too.

    The Dark Side... Pink Floyd :)

    The Boorman book was a trip. Karen over at FWIW sent me that one...

    I can't speak about something I don't know anything about, naturally, but IDK... I think you mattered! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you 💚.

      Pink Floyd, yeah. Icons!

      You read What We Buried? I'd like to hear what you thought of it...

      Thank you again - I know it's not true for a bunch of reasons (I WILL have to write that radio post one day), but it was sweet of you...

      Delete
    2. I thought the book was a trip! I didn't review it but had lotsa thoughts! I remember thinking- is she for real or was she just imagining large chunks of it? The twist was sobering.

      Delete
    3. I was more like "is he real?" 😂

      "Sobering" LOL, yeah. I wasn't even sure what I'd read until I discussed it with my buddy-reader Carrie! It was awesome though.

      Delete
    4. Same. I had to really think about it, and I might have told Karen what is this???

      Delete
  2. I'm sorry for your job loss. I would also like for you quit on your own terms because people rarely have a chance to quit their jobs. Good luck with finding a job.

    I'm the opposite of you when it comes to reading so I rarely read dark books but if you like them, I see no problem. I'm too much of a scaredy cat to read the books you read.

    I don't know much about radio shows, radio stations or anything so I have no idea what you do/did in your job but I'm sure you're good at it or else you wouldn't be working there for so long.

    Please, feel free to rant about your health, your unemployment, and whatever else you like. I think it's good to let out your feelings. I hope you'll get better.

    Have a lovely day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you!

      "I'm sure you're good at it or else you wouldn't be working there for so long."
      Eh...not exactly. Ours was a small local station, not one of the glamorous ones, and it's not like there was a line to replace me, but more than that...I feel like I went away unnoticed, because no one really cared. The station survived until my boss managed to find businesses that would pay for advertisement, and he was really good at that. But it doesn't mean we had a vast audience, or one who cared if "I" was there or not...

      Thank you again for enduring my rants 😉🧡.

      Delete
  3. I'm so sorry that things I had to end this way, Roberta :( But, please be assured that us folks in the blogosphere will always be here for you! Blogging may just be a hobby, but you've got a support here and you matter to me. Don't ever think that you've just faded into the background, because whenever I get the chance, I will send a healing thought your way :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes I think blogging pals are the only people who care 🥺. Not only about me, of course - about one another...What you wrote was very sweet, and I feel the same way about you. Thank you!

      Delete
  4. I think the universe owes you, so I hope something great comes your way. I am glad your mom did ok with covid (you never know how that will go), but boo! for you not feeling well. ((HUGS))

    ReplyDelete
  5. I wish you were close enough to build you a blanket fort, pour you a hot cocoa, and give you a giant hug. I hope you are well and heal quickly. Sending prayers for a job, too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would love a blanket fort (I could feel like a kid again!)...and a cocoa, and a hug. Thank you 🧡.

      Delete
  6. I'm so sorry to hear you're having a rough time of it, lovely. It's always hard to leave a job when it isn't really what you wanted. Sending lots of good vibes your way. I hope something good comes along soon!

    Looking forward to your upcoming reviews, and so excited about Josh's new book! That sounds right up my alley. If you're planning to read it when it comes out, maybe we can buddy read! 💛

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 🧡💚🧡

      I'm very curious about Josh's new book, so definitely!

      Delete
  7. Those are hardly first world problems. They are very real and impactful.

    I didn't know your mom had COVID. Just your MIL with hip? surgery.

    Although we are in very different circumstances, I get how you feel about the job situation. I went through a very dark time after our move for similar feelings. It's tough to be let go of so easily.

    You know I'm here if you ever need to talk or vent and I'm sending you the biggest batch of good vibes I can muster,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you 😭. And yep, my mom had Covid, but thankfully it didn't last long. My MIL had femur surgery instead.

      "I went through a very dark time after our move for similar feelings. It's tough to be let go of so easily."
      I didn't know - I wish I had, maybe I could have helped a little. It's not just being let go for me, though. It's that I'm the local radio host with the 2nd longest running time, but I realised I've only been background noise for all these years.

      And I know! thank you!

      Delete
  8. I know you must be under a lot of stress at the moment but I do hope that things work out and you start to feel hopeful again. Sending hugs your way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Feeling hopeful is probably harder than actually finding a job right now, but I'll try. Thank you! hugs received 💚.

      Delete
  9. Oh, Roberta, this post breaks make my heart. I hope something amazing comes out of all of this. You're a wonderful human and you deserve it! Also, I have to say some of the lines in this post are downright poetic. You may not write fiction, but you're a damn good writer.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 💚😭🧡

      "You may not write fiction, but you're a damn good writer."
      Thank you...this means a lot to me, from a real writer.

      Delete
    2. I agree!!!! You know I think you should be a book blurb writer lol

      Delete
    3. Is that a feasible career choice? 😂

      Delete
  10. Hooray I found a fix which is that I have to enable third party cookies to comment. In case anyone is wondering.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad you were able to trick the system LOL. I was just going through your email. Thank you for your well-wishes!

      Delete
  11. I'm sorry the bad continues :-( And that your job experiences have been such a disappointment. I sometimes find that the more down my mood gets, the more I want darker books, because lighter stuff can just make me feel worse like, "LIFE ISN'T LIKE THAT," so your reading makes sense to me. I hope you're feeling alright and that things start looking up for you soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "lighter stuff can just make me feel worse like, "LIFE ISN'T LIKE THAT,""
      Exactly! Though of course, real life isn't full of supernatural creatures and paranormal abilities and alternate realities and time travel either 😂 - but I always reason that, if I have to escape, I at least want the truly extraordinary package, not the things that "might" happen but never do.

      Thank you! 🧡

      Delete

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